before the new seattle "hotspot" SUGAR even opened it's doors, i was anxious to check it out. the advertising flier that i rec'd from re:launch! hitgirl made the new club seem like it could very well be theplace.
opening weekend got cancelled – a plumbing issue they said and i should have known then that this club might have issues, but i gave it the benefit of the doubt. i could sympathize; i watched open bar - the reality television show featuring the trials and tribulations of opening a new bar. so i gave SUGAR a shot and decided along with my friends that this last saturday (6.4.06) was time to pop the SUGAR cherry.
earlier in the day i was online searching for a website - research. i wanted to find out what was Saturday night's "theme," ... i had heard STARF*CKER, but you know how fickle clubs can be – they change their events all the time. while searching the world wide web i happened upon this article from The Stranger's online blog. which made me apprehensive about going. i've been to COMEBACK @ Chop Suey and loved it, so if the COMEBACK promoters were pulling out what was i in for?
the club itself very much fit my taste. most of the clubs/venues in seattle are more of a "whooly mammoth" style. other than Manray your hard pressed to find a venue/club/bar with white backdrops and soft blue/pink/green lighting. the layout of SUGAR has so much potential and this was why i was so excited. that excitement faded quickly. even though there is an upper balcony that runs along the outter perimeter of the dance floor the club seems very cramped, regardless of the fact that there was only about 45 people!!! the dance floor is small and at midnight was empty. it's clean, sharp even – a nice break from the other venues i've been to, but the crowd left much to be desired. think BLUE BALLS.
the crowd made my stomach turn and quite frankly put me in a foul mood. a mood that not even mr. jagermeister could help me recover from. there's is nothing more upsetting that a bunch of newly 20 college girls flailing themselves around a dance floor resembling that of an epileptic ceisure, grinding on every young gay boy they meet and showing off their wal-mart panties. if anyone so much as mentions lyrics from gretchen wilson's, "redneck woman" you will leave me no other choice than to disown you, completely.
the music they played was "alright" if you never get out and have no taste. and around the time that a club remixes the theme from Bareback Mount'him, accept it as god's way of saying, "leave, leave now before it gets any worse!" so we did and headed to Chop Suey for Keek Out Freak Out 3 (another of the Re: Launch! Hit Girl events). side note: obviously George didn't know anything about Re:Lauch! HitGirl , or what they do. they do fantastic events, but they also have certain clientel and it's not "young gay white boys." they represent diversity and their diversity doesn't = LAME.
verdict: SUGAR = LAME! (i give it 6 months unless mr. george can come up with a better way to get people in the door)
my advice to George if you want a better clientele and a better club, KNOW what young gay boys want. know the music, know the dj's you need, and especially know what kind of eye candy they want. the eye candy parading around SUGAR on saturday were new york urbanites; scruffy face, construction boots, tool belts, hot pants and trucker hats. if you're looking to attract the COMEBACK crowd then great, but "young gay white boys" want to see young gay white "go go" boys. barely legal. KNOW WHAT THEY WANT, and hire the right people to produce it.
Monday, June 05, 2006
Thursday, June 01, 2006
who's down wit O.P.P?
subliminal messages in pop songs. let's discuss. perhaps subliminal is not the right word – maybe subtext is more appropriate. it's an age old idea – artists layering their songs with messages, hiding sexually charged societal observations between catchy rhymes and fancy word manipulation.
oh don't act like you didn't go to a club a time or two and find yourself chanting along to Naught By Nature's O.P.P, "ya down wit OPP, yeah you know me!" sad thing is, i'm sure you didn't realize at the time that you were admitting to adultery or to being without morals in the bedroom. (someone else's penis?) "yeah you know me!" many people accepted O.P.P as an acronym for Other Peoples Property and naively skimmed over the fact that the acronym is about a very different P; refering to both female and male genitalia. i recently had a conversation with my girlfriend about this very song, in which she asked, "what does O.P.P stand for?" if you listen to the song they tell you, but because the very first verse explains it as PROPERTY we don't really pay much attention to the second two verses. ya still down with O.P.P?
hidden messages aren't always sexual; pop artists are getting much more clever hiding christian themes beneath beats and riffs as well. look at the popular band Evanescense. they say they aren't a christian band, but both ben moody and david hodges (writers/producers/and one time band members) have both admitted to putting "meaning" behind their songs. those meanings have not been verified publically as christian meanings, but again both men are self proclaimed "christians." *
it's no wonder that more and more big companies are getting shtooped. (are pop artists really getting smarter or are big company just getting dumber) the following example is used simply because i love her so and i'm genuinely a fan... but just because i'm a fan doesn't mean she's exempt from being a part of my comedic agenda.
i'm talking about none other than the very successful "girl next door" – kelly clarkson. she has recently teamed up with FORD Motors to be their newest campaign spokesperson. why? according to a self-admission from clarkson during a recent interview with FOX network, "they are an all american company and for some reason i'm seen as the all american girl. so it's a good match." i wonder what FORD would think if they knew Ms. Clarkson's recent song was viewed more as a recollection of "the first time," rather than a person making a bold move in life (maybe not THE first, but A first nonetheless.) **
Kelly Clarkson's song GO, has been commissioned by FORD Motors to play in the background (and in some cases the foreground) of their recent Bold Moves campaign (american idol pushes at least 1 FORD spot every commercial break). in addition to the commercials, a recent clarkson fan told me, you can hear the song played over the intercom systems in FORD showrooms.
Go has you believeing that you're listening to a modern day self empowerment message but if you listen carefully you might catch yourself blushing a bit. ultimately, FORD Motors is pimpin' a song about BOLD MOVES when really it's about two people boldly moving toward the bedroom. i would love to say, "it's a shame that FORD hasn't caught on," or "what kind of message are we sending our young kids," but instead i say, "hell yeah girl! say what you wanna say, and if FORD hasn't caught on – good for you!"
"Breathe in, breathe out, restless, waiting for anything, tension is thick in the air, are you gonna lead or follow me? full speed, turn up the overdrive, makes me feel glad that i'm alive, it's time we finally make our move, so c'mon, c'mon, c'mon now. let's go, let's just right in, scream into the wind, feel the fire within, i can't ignore this burnin' in my soul, c'mon baby let's go." (Lyrics are copywrite of Kelly Clarkson and others. I make no claims to this song, or it's lyrics.)
making music has always been about freedom of speech. the fact that a girl like kelly clarkson – the first winner of an audience and "america voted" television program - can write a song about the discussion between two people before they "do it" makes me want to proudly shout from the rooftops, "pop culture has won, bitches! and i'm down wit it."
EDIT: a kelly clarkson fan that happened upon this blog was so nice to point out the fact that it was actually naughty by nature that sang O.P.P not n.w.a. what was i thinkin' - here i am tryin' to be funny and i just look like an a$$. thanks man/woman whoever you are...
* i do not know ben moody or david hodges, this information was gathered from past interviews and articles.
** i do not know kelly clarkson or her intention when writing this song, all i am implying is that the song runs along a very thin line between what she says it means, and what it is saying.
oh don't act like you didn't go to a club a time or two and find yourself chanting along to Naught By Nature's O.P.P, "ya down wit OPP, yeah you know me!" sad thing is, i'm sure you didn't realize at the time that you were admitting to adultery or to being without morals in the bedroom. (someone else's penis?) "yeah you know me!" many people accepted O.P.P as an acronym for Other Peoples Property and naively skimmed over the fact that the acronym is about a very different P; refering to both female and male genitalia. i recently had a conversation with my girlfriend about this very song, in which she asked, "what does O.P.P stand for?" if you listen to the song they tell you, but because the very first verse explains it as PROPERTY we don't really pay much attention to the second two verses. ya still down with O.P.P?
hidden messages aren't always sexual; pop artists are getting much more clever hiding christian themes beneath beats and riffs as well. look at the popular band Evanescense. they say they aren't a christian band, but both ben moody and david hodges (writers/producers/and one time band members) have both admitted to putting "meaning" behind their songs. those meanings have not been verified publically as christian meanings, but again both men are self proclaimed "christians." *
it's no wonder that more and more big companies are getting shtooped. (are pop artists really getting smarter or are big company just getting dumber) the following example is used simply because i love her so and i'm genuinely a fan... but just because i'm a fan doesn't mean she's exempt from being a part of my comedic agenda.
i'm talking about none other than the very successful "girl next door" – kelly clarkson. she has recently teamed up with FORD Motors to be their newest campaign spokesperson. why? according to a self-admission from clarkson during a recent interview with FOX network, "they are an all american company and for some reason i'm seen as the all american girl. so it's a good match." i wonder what FORD would think if they knew Ms. Clarkson's recent song was viewed more as a recollection of "the first time," rather than a person making a bold move in life (maybe not THE first, but A first nonetheless.) **
Kelly Clarkson's song GO, has been commissioned by FORD Motors to play in the background (and in some cases the foreground) of their recent Bold Moves campaign (american idol pushes at least 1 FORD spot every commercial break). in addition to the commercials, a recent clarkson fan told me, you can hear the song played over the intercom systems in FORD showrooms.
Go has you believeing that you're listening to a modern day self empowerment message but if you listen carefully you might catch yourself blushing a bit. ultimately, FORD Motors is pimpin' a song about BOLD MOVES when really it's about two people boldly moving toward the bedroom. i would love to say, "it's a shame that FORD hasn't caught on," or "what kind of message are we sending our young kids," but instead i say, "hell yeah girl! say what you wanna say, and if FORD hasn't caught on – good for you!"
"Breathe in, breathe out, restless, waiting for anything, tension is thick in the air, are you gonna lead or follow me? full speed, turn up the overdrive, makes me feel glad that i'm alive, it's time we finally make our move, so c'mon, c'mon, c'mon now. let's go, let's just right in, scream into the wind, feel the fire within, i can't ignore this burnin' in my soul, c'mon baby let's go." (Lyrics are copywrite of Kelly Clarkson and others. I make no claims to this song, or it's lyrics.)
making music has always been about freedom of speech. the fact that a girl like kelly clarkson – the first winner of an audience and "america voted" television program - can write a song about the discussion between two people before they "do it" makes me want to proudly shout from the rooftops, "pop culture has won, bitches! and i'm down wit it."
EDIT: a kelly clarkson fan that happened upon this blog was so nice to point out the fact that it was actually naughty by nature that sang O.P.P not n.w.a. what was i thinkin' - here i am tryin' to be funny and i just look like an a$$. thanks man/woman whoever you are...
* i do not know ben moody or david hodges, this information was gathered from past interviews and articles.
** i do not know kelly clarkson or her intention when writing this song, all i am implying is that the song runs along a very thin line between what she says it means, and what it is saying.
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
patience is a virtue
what is it with people and their insisting on getting out of the elevator to determine what floor they're on? is there not a little screen, or a set of numbers, or buttons, or something that indicates what floor you're on? do you have to stop half in/half out in order to know?
as you linger in the doorway trying to decide what floor you've happened upon, you're making it virtually impossible for me to get in. and when i don't hold the door for you, you give me a dirty look (when you finally realize you are on the wrong floor and try to get back in) that makes me want to say to you, "patience is a virtue, now wait for the next fuckin' elevator!"
as you linger in the doorway trying to decide what floor you've happened upon, you're making it virtually impossible for me to get in. and when i don't hold the door for you, you give me a dirty look (when you finally realize you are on the wrong floor and try to get back in) that makes me want to say to you, "patience is a virtue, now wait for the next fuckin' elevator!"
"the geriatrics" as a sociological wonder
as i was puttering behind a toyota corola brazened with a "badge of honor," (a window cling from a college either completed or attended – not one in the same i'm finding) i couldn't help but smile at the irony that had presented itself. "lewis and clark college". didn't lewis and clark discover new territory? Or set out to find new trails?
BITCH, DISCOVER THE ROAD IN FRONT OF YOU AND SPEED THE HELL UP!
as i passed her, going a mere 41mph (on a 60mph freeway), i noticed she was near comatose. this naturally led my mind to that of the elderly.
pondering the overwhelming increase in "the geriatrics" behind the wheel, i am faced with a question; one that i wish to pose to all of you now. i think elderly people should have to take a second test after they exceed a certain age in order to get their license renewed. valid right? it's like assuming that because g.versace took his entrance exam to the xyz fashion institute 100 years ago that he could still design clothes from beyond the grave.
look.over.your.damn.shoulder. and if you can't turn your neck that far – i do believe my point has been made...
BITCH, DISCOVER THE ROAD IN FRONT OF YOU AND SPEED THE HELL UP!
as i passed her, going a mere 41mph (on a 60mph freeway), i noticed she was near comatose. this naturally led my mind to that of the elderly.
pondering the overwhelming increase in "the geriatrics" behind the wheel, i am faced with a question; one that i wish to pose to all of you now. i think elderly people should have to take a second test after they exceed a certain age in order to get their license renewed. valid right? it's like assuming that because g.versace took his entrance exam to the xyz fashion institute 100 years ago that he could still design clothes from beyond the grave.
look.over.your.damn.shoulder. and if you can't turn your neck that far – i do believe my point has been made...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)